It’s no news that sex is extremely important to men. Most men even admit that among the list of things they want in a marriage, sex makes the number 1 spot. However, some men have other desires aside from emotional needs and sexual relations.
Most husbands find it hard to ask their wives for what they want, but a lot of them have feelings and thoughts that they keep to themselves.
For example, some men feel a sense of obligation to cater for their wives financially, even if she earns more or they both agreed to contribute equal amounts to provide for the household.
This instance creates a form of pressure that affects the relationship. So familiarising with his inner world will pave the way to a whole new world of understanding and opportunity.
Table of Contents
- 1. Affection
- 2. Belief in his capabilities
- 3. Understanding
- 4. Affirmation and Appreciation
- 5. Acceptance
- 6. Less chatter
- 7. Respect
- 8. Free time
- 9. Trust
- 10. Companionship
Though most men love sex a lot, some men just want to be showered with more affection. Whether it’s massaging his shoulders, holding his hands in public, or leaving a love message on his voicemail – showing that you care about him through spontaneous gestures of fondness will melt his heart.
Try different ways to show how much you care about him by being warm. Kinds of Stuff you can do can include telling him when things go wrong, cheering him on when he’s in doubt and telling him how much you love him.
You can always go ahead and kiss him unexpectedly or flirt with him a little. Experiment with emotional and romantic affection to see what works for him.
2. Belief in his capabilities
A lot of men believe they have to protect and cater for those they love. Let your spouse know that you believe in his skills and talents and are supportive of him. Your encouragement is the most significant of anyone.
The best thing you can do is making your man feel like a man and not a little boy. Experiment with what makes him tick by giving him a little control (so long you are comfortable).
For example, you could put him in charge of directions or letting him order for you the next time you both are out on a date. Little gestures like this help build trust between you two and give him a sense of responsibility in the relationship.
Men love to know that you ‘get’ them. They like to solve problems and are often more logical. This has value and creates a balance between the women who are more in touch with their feelings and are generally emotional.
There are ways you both can show you understand each other and creating time to talk daily is one of them. Plan a daily dialogue routine where you take at least 10 minutes to ask each other positive questions.
This could include things like what your husband’s personal quality is, your favourite date together, what attracts you to one another.
4. Affirmation and Appreciation
Most men love being patted on the back. One way to do this is by complimenting him often. Instead of over-doing it, make sure it’s sporadic throughout the week and genuine.
Do simple stuff like:
- Telling him how good he looks in a particular shirt
- Let him know that you appreciate how hard he works
- Kiss your spouse and tell him you admire him as a person
- Thank your husband for how he takes care of the family
Everyone loves it when they are accepted for who they are and don’t want others to try to change them. Men in particular often feel hurt and angered when their wives try to change them.
If it concerns their safety and health, it’s understandable, but it’s not necessary to bring up superficial characteristics. You can let your partner know how much you accept him for who he is by:
- Letting things slide when it comes to different activities, politics or opinions.
- Committing to agree to disagree in arguments
- Getting comfortable with being different from our spouse.
- Noticing his flaws and loving him regardless
- Learning ways to accept ourselves so we can accept our partners.
6. Less chatter
If your husband is involved in a project, feeling tired or generally isn’t up for a chat, don’t push it. Sometimes, women can be especially chatty, so it’s important to create time to talk with your husband.
Try expressing yourself in additional ways to other family members, friends, or through alternative means like journaling, art and other online forums.
Don’t get this wrong, communication is very important, and no one wants a relationship where you never talk. So when you really want to get intimate and chat, check in with him to see if he’s up for it. But if he’s busy, you may need to carve out some time for you two to get back on track.
Creating a memorable and loving marriage begins with respect. One of the great ways you can show your husband you respect and love him is by listening to him and not interrupting him when he talks. You can also show respect by:
- Being considerate of his upcoming plans.
- Avoiding the use of ‘eye roll’ when you’re arguing with him.
- Opting not to make any negative comments about his opinions and thoughts.
- Generally being thankful, positive, and considerate of his needs and wants.
8. Free time
Almost everyone craves a little quiet alone time, and a moment to recoup, regroup, reconnect with themselves. When your partner gets home from work, you can allow him some space to unwind without any questions or chatter.
When he’s off work, be mindful of his schedule by not planning so many activities. If you really need to spend some quality time your husband, try picking one day on the weekend or making plans for every other weekend.
Trust is one of the keys to a successful marriage. Couples in a healthy relationship could build trust by being honest with one another, learning how to fight fair and square, and communicating often. As years roll by, you both will learn how to be yourselves, keep promises and show how much you love and appreciate each other.
If you’re having doubts about your spouse and find it hard to trust him, seek counselling and try not to engage in activities like spying or infidelity.
Hopefully, you can say that your husband is your friend, not only your lover. Staying companions and friends throughout the years mean that you have to figure out ways of spending quality times together and having new experiences.
Getting married to your best friend also requires you being mindful of how you talk to each other, making little sacrifices to please each other and not taking him for granted.
Practice using kind words, show your gratitude for him regularly, and opt to watch his favourite local sports game or play video games with him sometimes.
What other things do you think a man wants out of a relationship apart from these things mentioned above? Tell us by making use of the comment section below. We would love to hear your opinion.